Why Anger and Desire to Look at Haram increases in Ramadan? | Truth & Knowledge

May 17, 2021 07:15 · 4307 words · 21 minute read

“Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem, Atiullah wa atiur Rasul wa Ulil amre minkum. ” And always a reminder for myself ana abdukal ‘ajeezu, dayeefu, miskinu, wa zhalim, wa jahl, and but for the grace of Allah (AJ) that we are still in existence.

00:27 - And alhamdulillah that the blessed month of Ramadan is a month of ‘ibadah and worshipness.

00:33 - And alhamdulillah as it happens the programs are longer in the month of Ramadan and all the zikrs (Divine Remembrance) going on and the best form of worshipness for this time of month is these mawlids (celebration of the birthday of Prophet ﷺ), the zikrs (association of divine remembrance), these associations.

00:55 - So, alhamdulillah there’s no better place to be than in these majlis and these associations.

01:03 - We pray that Allah (AJ) always give us a life filled with the zikr of Allah (AJ), filled with the love of Sayyidina Muhammad ﷺ. Alhamdulillah that we covered a lot of subjects and so, before we go on and keep going into different things do people have questions from the. .

01:29 - the talks that we’ve had and the associations that have taken place.

01:34 - That to know ourself is to know our lord, and our whole way is based on knowing ourself.

01:48 - That people who don’t know themselves they distance themselves from knowing their Lord.

01:58 - Means that how can we know Rabbiul a’ala – the Lord Most High, Allah (AJ) Supremacy, His Signs and Majestic Realities, when we don’t know ourself? And that’s why Prophet ﷺ came and says, ‘Who knows himself will know his Lord,’ and the reverse is also true that who doesn’t know himself, doesn’t know his Lord.

02:24 - Although they may think they know their Lord.

02:28 - That’s the whole secret of the tariqah (spiritual path) is that everybody thinking they know Allah (AJ), they know all about the Islam, they know all about the realities, they know what they need to know.

02:41 - And Prophet ﷺ came and gave us something very easy that, ‘Who knows himself will know his Lord. ’ And if the person is not taking a path in which to know himself which is right in front of him or her, how they could know anything else? So, then the whole reality of tariqah is in just this one hadith.

03:09 - Just we said many times: one hadith is enough for somebody to reach their reality.

03:14 - If you plan that you think you have to memorize a thousand but you don’t implement just one then what, what… the cassette recorder or the recording device serves a better purpose than that.

03:31 - Our life was to take the holy hadith, implement it within our life and reach to its realities and unlock the treasures that Allah (AJ) has placed within our heart and our being.

03:45 - So, then when we take just to know myself, I have to really know myself.

03:52 - If I don’t know myself, I fall into every trigger that shaitan (satan) is sending.

04:00 - Because before you can know Rabbiul a’ala we have to come back down to the level of earth and say, what is shaitan playing with you at every moment? Shaitan is like the cat, you are the mouse, and every minute he’s sticking his paws.

04:19 - If you’ve ever watched a. . the cat with a mouse he doesn’t eat it right away, he actually takes great pleasure in tormenting the mouse.

04:28 - He just poke it around and he’s fascinated how the mouse think it’s going to run away and then with his nail again he grabs it and throws it and move it around.

04:38 - And shaitan is doing the same thing with us.

04:41 - Excuse me… A’uzu Billah. That continuously playing with us making us to fall into his satanic trap.

04:55 - So, tariqah’s the small is not the large where you think: ‘I’m going to master the large realities to reach to Allah (AJ). ’ It’s the fine understanding of myself and where shaitan is playing with me, what are the triggers that shaitan uses each time to make me fall, and if I’m not passing that there’s no real accomplishment in my journey to the Lord of Power.

05:27 - Although the illusion maybe there, I may have many illusions in my world of khairat and imagination.

05:35 - So, that’s why many awliyaullah (saints) have writings on imaginal world.

05:41 - You can imagine anything – you can imagine your closeness, you can imagine your grace, you can imagine tajjalis (manifestations) coming to you, you can imagine visions that coming into your heart, shaitan can send those.

05:55 - But the proof is in the khuluq (character).

06:00 - When Allah (AJ) wants to stamp the reality for Sayyidina Muhammad ﷺ for us to understand: “Wa khuluqal ‘azheem” That Allah (AJ) Used the immense reality of Holy Qur’an and sealed it for all of existence, for all of time that ‘You are khuluqal ‘azheem – you are of a magnificent character. ’ That’s not something small, it’s so large it can’t even be understood.

06:34 - But as a result of that reality, it’s the seal of Allah’s (AJ) eternal love and acceptance and gift and bounty.

06:45 - That ‘Your khuluq is of a magnificent character that whatever We put you with your khuluq is the proof of who you are. ’ Not your talks, not your vision, not your thinking of who you are but the khuluq is the proof of the pudding.

07:05 - So, in our lives, we’re not even a dust under the feet of the reality of Sayyidina Muhammad ﷺ but we should be inheriting that teaching and that understanding.

07:18 - What sets us apart from everything else is the school of adab (manners) and khuluq – of character.

07:26 - That what is my character? And that’s why Prophet ﷺ described: ‘You have to know yourself; you have to spend your life in contemplation. ’ As soon as you’re about to get angry you have to know your triggers, because is shaitan again putting his nail into you for something to come? You’re just going to always be a mouse in his trap? Then you are not the servant of Allah (AJ), you are a mouse in shaitan’s playing field.

08:00 - He stick his nail into you, you screaming and yelling.

08:04 - He stick his nail into you, you getting angry.

08:07 - He stick his nail into you, you lose your faith and you’re upset about everything.

08:15 - Every prick he hits your character is coming out - ‘I want to quit everything; I want to stop everything.

08:23 - I’m angry about everything…’ whatever people’s character, everyone has to go back to look at their characters and understand what is it that shaitan’s doing.

08:32 - So, in the month of Ramadan in which the energies are so powerful, is a time in which to make ittikaf.

08:43 - The whole of Ramadan is a time in which the servant should be looking at themselves and getting to know themselves: What is my trigger? Why am I getting angry? Why is my character happening on this issue?’ And doesn’t have to be anger, ‘Why am I getting excited? Why do I have not appropriate desires? Why do I like this? Why is it like this? Whatever the spectrum of bad characters are we have to understand and identify: no, this is a bad character and why is it happening? What is shaitan doing that brings this character out? Only then the patient can identify the sickness and they see how shaitan’s playing with them.

09:32 - Many people they want to look at inappropriate things and Ramadan they don’t even stop in Ramadan.

09:39 - Thing that not is halal (permissible) for you.

09:42 - Want to get angry – it’s not appropriate to be angry.

09:46 - Want to doubt everything that ‘Why is like this?’ It is the way exactly Allah (AJ) wants it.

09:54 - On the days you have faith you understand it, on the days that shaitan play with you, you’re doubting everything.

10:00 - Why does. . why do people’s characters want to make a drama, want to make an excess, make all the things that we can imagine if you don’t know ourselves and we don’t spend a life in which, ‘Ya Rabbi I don’t want this to make me angry again.

10:18 - I don’t want this trigger that shaitan plays. ’ It don’t matter what and who is bringing it, behind that is shaitan making the different characters in this play of our life to come and excite something, bring something that’s not appropriate and then we begin to react upon it.

10:42 - And the turuqs their purpose was to bring this understanding, teach them, teach them on how to identify how shaitan is playing with them.

10:53 - And that when that comes and that emotion comes how to quickly attack it, ‘I’m not to be angry now.

11:00 - I’m not to make a drama out of this. I’m not to have doubt in my faith. ’ Because as soon as you react on it, you became the mureed (devoted disciple) of shaitan at that time and you’re path to Allah (AJ) just became a lot longer, a lot more difficult, because there’s no growth.

11:20 - But when the servant is wuquf and wuquf ul- qalb (vigilance of the heart)– vigilant on themselves like their heart is asking for the. . a diamonds from heaven, and they view themselves like a something that shaitan is going to come to rob their faith.

11:41 - So they’re every night vigilant. As soon as something’s about to happen they’re going to their area, they wash – they make their wudu (ablution), they pray their two rakahs (cycles of prayer) and they begin to make their tafakkur – their contemplation, they make their salawats (praises upon Prophet Muhammad ﷺ) and they ask Prophet ﷺ to send a faiz (downpouring blessings), send a light, take anger away, take this character away, take this issue away until they can clearly see what’s happening.

12:08 - And every time that issue comes they know exactly how to try to defend against it, they make their salawats in it, they don’t fall prey into it and say now they start to play the whole game of the yelling, screaming, shouting, doubting, all the different things.

12:22 - Because then. . now at that time you’re just a. . shaitan is like a cat and he just throwing you around and having such a good time.

12:30 - But then imagine the view in front of awliyaullah, that you’re supposed to be rijal (people of maturity), you’re supposed to be in training with these shaykhs to be of adulthood – a maturity.

12:43 - And they’re all watching and say, ‘What’s this that you’re doing? You don’t see shaitan is playing with you getting you angry, getting you emotional, getting you to lose your faith, getting you to doubt everything, getting you to do everything that is haram and forbidden?’ So, that holy hadith is enough for our whole existence of tariqah to reach towards our ma’rifah (Gnosticism).

13:06 - That I have to get to know myself. What is it that’s doing? Why do I get angry? Why do I have these…? And the whole spectrum I can’t even mention all of the. . the bad characteristics and ruinous traits.

13:18 - And as soon as they come and those that are very profound in our life that continuously happen, continuously happen over and over and over, it’s a form of retardation, not for the poor people whom their brain is actually in difficulty and a sickness, it becomes like a mental problem.

13:41 - And we said before that when they want to free the people from mental hospital, they put them through a test.

13:49 - They put a flowing water and give… we gave this example many times.

13:55 - There’s a room, there’s a sink, the doctor comes and clogs the sink and turns the tap on, the water overflowing and then the floor is filled with water and there’s a mop.

14:07 - And they invite one by one say, ‘Are you ready to graduate?’ And each one come: ‘Yes, yes I’m ready, I’m graduate now. ’ He walks into the room and sees the wet floor and begin to mopping, mopping, mopping, mopping, mopping, thinking it’s obvious, ‘I take a mop and I just keep mopping around the water from this side to the water to that side, the water to this side. ’ Doctor say, ‘Okay, okay, okay. . you go back in, you’re not ready yet. ’ And one by one the patient keep doing the same thing until the one whom Allah (AJ) inspired to have an aqel (intellect) and understanding in their practices comes into the room and say, ‘I’ve done this many times and I understand this mopping is not going to go anywhere because there’s a problem of this water flowing.

14:55 - If I don’t stop the problem what’s the mopping going to do. ’ Because their vigilance, their muraqabah (spiritual connection), their salawats, their awrads (daily practices) and all the tools that Allah (AJ) has given to them it’s a ni’mat (blessing).

15:13 - Imagine all the poor souls that Allah (AJ) didn’t guide with these tools and they don’t know how to deal with any of life’s difficulties and they struggle through them.

15:23 - So, an immense blessing is Allah (AJ) send you to the scientists and the science of this reality where they teach, ‘Stop it, your room of insanity, your room of anger, your room of depression, your room of drama, your room of inappropriate desires, whatever your room is and you’re just playing around with your mop, you are not doing anything. ’ And its reality is you have to identify the source of that problem and the one whom is ready to graduate immediately walks in say, ‘I’ve done this too many times.

’ Goes over to the sink, unplugs it so that the water will go down and it won’t come onto the floor.

16:10 - Then what he has left of a difficulty on the floor he has to spend his life in cleaning that.

16:16 - So, it means then, one - is we identify the problem, what’s causing this problem, I have to unclog it and stop it.

16:25 - Every time shaitan is bringing that issue is not going to let me to react to that, and then I spend my life cleaning, doing my zikr, doing my salawats, doing my meditation, my contemplation.

16:39 - Meditation is not only you just sit there and ‘whoooo’ and go deep into ‘whooo’, but sit and wonder what you did for that day, why did you get mad again.

16:49 - When you ask to connect with the shaykhs, ask that ‘I want to be in your presence, I want to feel your light and feel your energy. ’ We said before how are you going to see Prophet ﷺ and you can’t see your shaykh, and the shaykh that… you don’t even see the shaykh that you took bayat (allegiance) with.

17:08 - You have no idea who he is and what vision you have of that shaykh.

17:12 - And the shaykh that you’re seeing everyday in your teachings and in his class and his…

17:17 - the shaykh you took bayat with is like the principal of the university.

17:22 - And the shaykh that you’re sitting in his madrasah (religious school) and learning and learning and learning, you can’t see him with your heart? Not illusional and. .

17:31 - ‘We came here, we went to this place, we went…’ No, no the shaykh is just there, ‘Your faiz dress me, fill me with that light, that fill me with that inspiration, tell me the things that I’m doing wrong and my bad characteristics.

17:47 - Let me to understand through my consciousness of what I’m doing wrong. ’ Because he’ll never tell you what you’re doing wrong.

17:53 - He’ll make jokes and different things and talk because they can never give anything directly to anyone, nobody’s capable of carrying that.

18:02 - But through the tafakkur they will, through the tafakkur they will begin to communicate with you: ‘Why it’s like that?’ and then they’ll point out your issue not anyone else’s because they’re not concerned about anyone’s grave but yours.

18:18 - When you ask and you’re trying to identify: ‘What I did that night wrong?’ Just a few minutes of making your hisaab (account).

18:24 - Ya Rabbi before I sleep, I sit after my Salatul ‘Isha (nighttime prayer): salaam, salaam alaykum, ‘what did I do wrong?’ And asking for madad (support) of my shaykh, ‘What did I wrong? And this issue that bothered me what role did I play in it?’ and ask their faiz to come and they’re not going to say, ‘Oh that guy was a bad guy and he bothered you. ’ But what was your role in everything you did wrong because you’re only worried about your grave and your character.

18:50 - ‘Whatever that person did, did I respond in an appropriate way that Allah (AJ) will be happy with me?’ Then you may be inspired, ‘No maybe you should have just stayed quiet, maybe you should have just walked away from everything, maybe you should have given everything to Allah (AJ) to handle instead of trying to take your own right,’ and many inspirations will come to the servant to keep their hisaab, every night.

19:13 - So, they don’t have to go deep meditation, they don’t have to look to see the universes, just look to see themselves – ‘Am I doing everything that I’m supposed to be doing? Am I making my connection? Am I feeling all the things that I’m doing wrong? Am I giving the support that I’m supposed to be supporting with?’ You know everything is proportionate.

19:36 - The one who has nothing and he gives five dollars that’s his entire existence, imagine the reward that Allah (AJ) gives to a servant when they have nothing and what they contribute and support and do it’s proportionate to who they are and what they have.

19:59 - It’s just simple mathematics. Allah (AJ) give based on who that person is.

20:08 - When they do and they support and they give, that’s the time of tafakkur.

20:12 - And the one whom has everything and give little like a chocolate chip, Allah (AJ) Say, ‘Really? That’s about the chocolate chip you’re going to get of support,’ because your belief is that much [small] and you’re showing Allah (AJ) you have no belief.

20:31 - You’re showing Allah (AJ), ‘I don’t really care if You’re going to send me anything or not.

20:36 - I’m just doing this for the fun of it. ’ Means everything about our existence is real, everything of our existence and this hisaab is of an immense important.

20:48 - Because when I’m sitting and being honest with myself and asking for the connection, asking for the madad, inspirations begin to come.

20:57 - As if you can listen to those that are hardest that, ‘You know you shouldn’t have done like that, you shouldn’t have given like that, you shouldn’t have expressed yourself like that. ’ They would tell us in our training: ‘Pick up the paper. ’ We walk on the street when you’re listening to yourself and you see something and you say, ‘Ah,’ and you listen to your angelic inspiration say, ‘Pick it up,’ you stop and pick it up.

21:27 - You think what was the significance? For you the significance was maybe nothing but it could have been everything for Allah (AJ).

21:36 - We said that how awliya got their trust, oh because they sat with their shaykh and he gave them secrets of Surah YaSeen ﷺ? No, Imam Ghazali (Q) gave it on mawlid, he was writing with his pen and the ink the fly came to drink from the ink and he said, ‘For the sake of Sayyidina Muhammad ﷺ you’re a creation of Allah (AJ), I’m a creation of Allah (AJ) let you drink first. ’ He waited until the fly finished, finished and then he put his ink and started to write again.

22:07 - And Allah (AJ) said, ‘What you did was dearest to Me of all your actions, not all your khutbas (sermons), not all your sohbats, not all your majlis’s,’ in thousands would come.

22:17 - Their associations of these shayukh they’re attended by thousands of people.

22:22 - And Allah (AJ) said, ‘This was dearest to Me, the action that nobody saw but you listened to your heart. ’ So, the tariqah is based on this whole reality.

22:33 - Do you stop doing all your crazy things and that always being angry, always being doubtful, every time going into the same emotion, same characteristics or you say, ‘No the insanity has to stop.

22:46 - Ya Rabbi I have to stop it. ’ Then they say, ‘Okay great now identify the problem,’ so as soon as it comes you target it.

22:53 - Write it and post it everywhere: ‘I become crazy at this time of the month, I have emotions like this, I feel angry about this, I feel…’ so, that shaitan doesn’t fool you into falling into it.

23:05 - You know ‘This is oh. . this is my character.

23:07 - This one speaks I get angry. ’ So, you wrote it so that you don’t fall into that trigger.

23:12 - And then ‘Ya Rabbi let me to conquer it. ’ Make my salawats, make my connection, make all my practices, give what has to clean me of my bad characteristics.

23:24 - If I’m overwhelmed with these bad characteristics, they have to be taken away, they have to be taken away with immense support.

23:34 - When people are asking… this is a sign like a medical office, when people are asking, ‘Oh I don’t know which shaykh to listen to.

23:45 - I want to listen to all these shaykhs. ’ We said before, then you must not be contributing because anyone who’s contributing and contributing with all their force in a direction, they never have that question because they’re deeply involved, they’re enrolled, they’re paying their tuition, they’re locked into the course, they’re locked into the reality.

24:08 - There is no tuition but they’ve surrendered their life in that way, they don’t have that question.

24:13 - I gave my whole life to my shaykh, everything, anyone who knows our story we gave everything and on top of that everything more.

24:21 - You can’t just go next day to somebody else say, ‘Okay I’m going to give you now everything again,’ I don’t have anything.

24:29 - So your whole life, that is your lock. Their teaching is an immense reality.

24:37 - We lived a life of service then be of service, lock yourself into it, be committed to it, be ashamed in the presence of Sayyidina Muhammad ﷺ that you didn’t do it because they’re all watching, they’re all watching.

24:53 - That again, ‘You didn’t do anything? Your day and night is for what? For yourself?’ So, then this is the tariqah, this is the month in which to contemplate that that -Ya Rabbi most of all my character, and when I begin to improve my character to be of service that I give myself to your Divinely Presence.

25:16 - Didn’t the mother of Sayyidina Maryam (as) said, ‘I devote my child to your… your majlis, your temple. ’ Means people would give themselves, their awlaad – their children in the way of Allah (AJ) to be wholly devoted.

25:37 - We don’t need our parents to do it, we have to do it: Ya Rabbi I give myself to you.

25:42 - Make me to have good character, the best of example.

25:45 - Let my hands to be in service to You, my mouth and my heart to be in service to You, my feet to be in service to You so that you’re Rida and Satisfied with me and that you purify and correct my khuluq and that you are happy at that time to make my service to be in the way of Sayyidina Muhammad ﷺ.

26:05 - So, that Prophet ﷺ has ambassadors that have the best of character, the best of example.

26:16 - We pray that Allah (AJ) inspire us towards these goodness and the dress of all these realities and all these teachings of what can be accomplished and what can be achieved upon the soul.

26:31 - But the simplest is just sitting seven minutes at the end of the night and asking, ‘What did I do wrong?’ And I take a hisaab – an inventory, an accounting of myself on what am I doing and why am I falling always into the same traps and that to stop those inshaAllah.

26:50 - Subhana rabbika rabbal ‘izzati ‘amma yasifoon, wa salaamun ‘alal mursaleen, walhamdulillahi rabbil ‘aalameen.

26:56 - Bi hurmati Muhammad al-Mustafa wa bi siri Surat al-Fatiha. .