Life Goes On for Min Yoongi Live

Hi. Hi. Hi everyone. With “Life Goes On,” I’ve come back but couldn’t come back. This is SUGA. My shoulders? They are much better now. The pain also reduced a bit. I have this, which looks like Holly’s bag. Holly is actually in here, if I open this. Am I having a good rest? I am but, I don’t feel comfortable. I’m on a diet now, and before this, I ate too well. It’s been like three days. I, was eating too well. I got complacent.

03:14 - Does it hurt? It doesn’t hurt that much now. Barely hurts. Sometimes, when I unconsciously use my arm, that hurts. But it’s gotten much better. For about three days after the surgery, it was so painful. For the three days. I hardly slept. But now, I don’t have a problem sleeping. Maybe I got used to it. Right after the surgery, it didn’t hurt that much because I was under anesthetic. Then it began to hurt when I came out from it. You miss me? I miss you too. It’s hard to always work on music, and now I want to do some promo activities. “Don’t get hurt ever again”. I didn’t want to either. I didn’t want to. The comments are going up too fast. I ate too well in the hospital too. From two weeks before the surgery, I ate a lot as if I gave myself up. I got chubby cheeks. Now, I’m trying to lose weight. Just came by to say hi. The new album is out. But I couldn’t attend yesterday’s schedule. I want to, as soon as possible. To do that, I have to fully recover. How do you like the album, “BE”? Do you like it? I was looking through my work laptop.

06:42 - There is a folder called Mixdown where I organize the extracted digital files. The Mixdown folder. I opened it. I noticed that we almost finished making the album in July. It took too long to get released. I wanted the album to come out quickly. The reaction was good. Using my hand? I can. On the first day after the surgery, I couldn’t move my arm. It was paralyzed after the anesthesia. After I came out of it, I woke up, and my left arm didn’t move. I thought maybe it was not a good sign. But it started to move after the anesthesia wore off. I’m not in the hospital now.

08:06 - Isn’t this too good to be a hospital? I was discharged a while ago. Next Monday would be three weeks after the surgery. “How have you been?” I worked… I’m practically in self-quarantine right now. I couldn’t do anything. The fact that you can use both hands… You should be grateful if you can use both hands, seriously. It’s really hard to use only one hand. I take this aid off when I shower. At this point… I can’t hold anything with my left hand. My joints here, and here as well, are all stiff. So it’s tough.

09:18 - Do I sleep well? For about two weeks after the surgery… It’s been a little over two weeks now. It was so hard for me to sleep for about two weeks. I didn’t feel comfortable sleeping on either side of my body. I can’t sleep on my left side, of course. But if I change to my right side, that’s also super uncomfortable. I got used to it now, though. I do need physical therapy. I have to do it. I really want to get back to work as quickly as possible. The world is so boring, everyone. Super boring. But I…

09:57 - Usually after surgery, because of the IV fluids, and the antibiotics, your body swells up a lot. I’m not sure if I’m still swollen now. So I thought I should turn on VLIVE when I look a little more decent. I really wanted to avoid surgery as much as possible. But because of the repeated injuries… I was mentally and physically tired. I’m not going to be in my 20s forever. I’ll eventually turn in my 30s and 40s. And if I don’t take good care of myself now, I thought I would suffer a lot more later on. Even more so since this is a ligament. I could see that it was torn on the MRI scan. But when they did an endoscope… …on my joint, it wasn’t just one spot.

11:11 - So they stitched up all of the torn spots. “I love “Telepathy”!” It’s a great song. “Telepathy” had been kept on my computer for awhile. I had forgotten about it. When they were collecting songs for the album, I had only composed the chorus. Only until the chorus. But when they were collecting songs, I finished it all the way and sent it up, and it got chosen. It was not in the current key back then. It got much higher, so I had a hard time recording the song. I really want to recover soon, too. This is so uncomfortable. First of all, it’s hard to get dressed.

12:21 - To get dressed, I can’t wear pants with a zipper. Because I can’t reach it wearing this. I have to take this whole thing off in order to zip it up. So… I wear pajamas or jogger pants a lot. It’s not easy getting on a car, either. I can’t even sit comfortably in a car. To sit next to someone… It’s hard for me to even be in my manager’s car. This thing is huge! It’s gigantic. Look! It’s like Holly is going to pop out of this thing. I sleep a lot. I sleep for long hours at once. I’ve been studying English lately. I’ve been working on my music as well. But even for that, I usually use both hands.

13:43 - Working on my keyboard on this side, using the shortcut keys, and using the mouse on the other side. But I can’t reach now! So I use a wireless keyboard, and go like this. It’s hard. First, it was COVID-19 which led to canceling of performances, and plus, this happened with my arm… shoulder… So I can’t say that I’m at my best mentally. I really want to perform and be a part of the promotion.

14:45 - The comments are going up too fast! “Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?” Why would I fall from heaven? I want to do VLIVE and Weverse a lot, too. I really do. But the thing is… The thing is… I can only type with one hand. “Hello”. “How are you”? Like this. I can’t check my phone with both hands either. I can only use one hand. I shouldn’t go on a diet? That’ll get me in big trouble. I might gain weight exponentially. Starting from about three weeks prior to the surgery… Perhaps two weeks before… I just gave in and ate a lot. I ate so much since I knew I would only get hospital meals for a while.

15:56 - But I was unaware that we had some events left before the surgery. So you might be surprised. When you see what I’ve shot during that period. Don’t be too surprised when you see how I look. Just know that I was going through a hard time then. I know all too well that I should avoid surgery if I can. So I had been getting shots regularly at the clinic that I always go to. I had also been doing physical theraphy. But the shots… Usually, you don’t get the shots too often. You don’t have to get them too often. But I had to get one every 2-3 weeks. Some people have also said, “All you need is physical therapy”. Perhaps I might have been able to get by with that, had I been a white-collar. But after a performance, I’d get an inflammation. So…

17:29 - Because the labrum is torn, if this is my shoulder bone, it was not properly fixed. It kept moving around. So I had a lot of inflammation naturally. Even during concert tours, I’d get shots overseas during our tour. That’s what I was going through. I had gotten so many shots. I can’t use the arm well for a couple of days after the shot, too. This wasn’t even predictable, but I had to get shots all too often. Before a performance, I’d get a shot and after one as well.

18:12 - So people were saying that it was high time I got surgery. That’s when I did a “tour” of hospitals. I spoke to the doctors known as the best in this area. Even after that… I tried a lot of treatments including shots for a few months. But I’d get injured during physical therapies. During physical therapies! I’d think that I’m ok, do a performance, and find out that I have inflammation. At one point, for example, I could hold up my right arm like this, but not my left arm. I couldn’t even hold the mic. Because I’m right-handed, I normally hold the mic with my left hand. I always held the mic with my left hand. But if I was holding the mic with my right hand, that means I was having an issue with my shoulder that day. I feel so relieved now. Because I can finally get out of that vicious cycle. Because I won’t be in pain anymore. I used to think that it was a simple aftereffect of an accident.

19:31 - But since I turned 25? Around that point… I think that’s when it started to get worse, where it was torn. It’d hurt more on rainy days, and I just thought that it was a simple aftereffect of an accident. But after a while, it got so much worse. I had to get a shot in the UK, too. When we were on a tour. A shot as big as this. Right here. Two shots, one on the front, and one on the back. I had to get them. Surgery… I really didn’t want it, but there was a moment when I decided to get surgery.

20:42 - When was that? It was when we were shooting an ad. That was when… I had filmed the MV for “Daechwita” for two days. We were shooting an ad for Chilsung Cider the next day. Let me reenact with my right hand. You know that part when we were going like this, right? I used my left hand for that shot. The drink is 500ml. It’s about this small. I couldn’t hold it with my left hand. My arm, my shoulder was hurting so much. A mic does not weigh as much as 500g, but it still weighs about 100, 200g.

21:27 - So I thought to myself, ‘Can I seriously go on like this?’ I was lifting weights really hard starting last year until early this year. I was bulking up and working out really hard. But because of the shoulder, I switched to a lot of other workouts. Pilates, physical therapy, weight training… all kinds of stuff. I’d feel better when we’re not performing. But once we start performing… You should know the choreography to “Black Swan” is terrible for the shoulders. It’s bad, seriously. At least to me, it was. So… A 500ml bottle would be about this big, right? I couldn’t hold it with my left hand. If I had accidentally slept on my left side, that meant I couldn’t use my arm the whole day. It was a repeating thing. I was… Well… I was so busy. I was super busy during my early 20s. It was just… I guess I was always busy during my 20s. I just couldn’t make time. Usually… For professional baseball pitchers, it takes about 6 months to a year to get back on track after surgery. For me… my shoulders… Well… It’s not like my shoulders were essential to what I was doing for a living.

23:32 - So I thought I could get by with physical therapy, but I was wrong. That’s why I decided to get surgery. I did a lot of searching online. The rate of return for pitchers, the percentage of them. I really pondered upon whether I should get surgery or not. At four hospitals… Out of the four hospitals I went to, three recommended that I should get surgery. My hobby? I’ve been working on my English a lot lately. I’m studying hard. I can’t play the guitar. I can’t play it. It’s impossible. I can’t play the guitar. It’s impossible.

24:22 - If you look here, I have an exercise ball. My friend actually had the same surgery. That guy… He had the surgery about 10 years ago? 12 years ago? That’s what he said. He said this was called a “stress ball”. You have to squeeze it like this. “For how long do you have to wear the aid?” For two months. I have to wear this for two months. Everyone, it’s hard when you get sick. I know because I had appendix surgery. When I look back on the appendectomy, that was some tough times, too. Before the surgery this time, I asked the doctor if this would hurt more than an appendectomy.

25:20 - The doctor was like, “Hmm, I would say that the appendectomy is worse”. In terms of the pain, the appendix surgery was worse. But the inconvenience afterward, I can’t even begin to describe it. Think carefully before you decide to get an invasive surgery. I had thought about it for years. Starting with the rotator cuff, labrum, cruciate ligament… You need surgery for the cruciate ligament. But think hard before you decide on it. You can’t be the same after the surgery.

26:07 - Of course, that can depend on the rehabilitation. But to get an invasive surgery on your muscle, means it takes time for you to recover. Please think through before you get one. Usually, those who get injured while working out, mostly have the SLAP tears. As for the Bankart lesion, it’s also about the anterior, inferior part, similar to SLAP. In my case, it was a reverse Bankart tear. The posterior. That’s where it was torn. It’s not common, the reverse Bankart. It’s because of the accident. Here, here, and here. I have three scars.

27:01 - After the surgery, they show you the endoscope. That was a weird experience. They said it would’ve gotten much worse had I not received the surgery. So the doctor said that I made a good choice. I can’t show you the scars. I have three. What am I drinking? An americano. “I’m learning Korean”. Korean is a tough language to learn. I’m studying English these days, and it’s not easy. When you have a torn labrum, you can dislocate your shoulder.

28:10 - A torn labrum can result in shoulder dislocation. It’s not 100% but, when you have a torn labrum, it’s likely that you’ll dislocate your shoulder. It repeats constantly, the dislocation. It may not be a complete dislocation. Your muscles will catch it before the shoulder gets completely dislocated. But when the dislocation repeats constantly, you also get a lot of inflammations, everyone. Please be careful with the torn labrum. When you have a torn labrum, if you have a labral tear, proper rehabilitation, physical therapy, shots, and regular exercise will help you recover.

28:54 - As for me, even when I did all that, because I used my shoulders a lot, I injured myself again too many times. “Food after the surgery”? After the surgery… hospital meals are never good, regardless of which hospital they’re from. But I had a lot of great stuff after the surgery. These days, because of COVID-19, visitors are not allowed at hospitals. I could only have one visitor in my room. So… From the office, our manager, the director, came. And the staff had to take turns coming in. I see that you’re asking us to come to your country all across the world, and I really want to! I really do, but the circumstances don’t allow us. So please hang in there. That’s also why I wrote “Telepathy”. I wanted to tell you to hang in there just for a while. We are… This is my eighth year now. We debuted in ‘13, so it’s been seven years and we’re in our eighth year now. I…

30:35 - It hasn’t been a year yet, right? Around the time we released “ON,” COVID-19 began to spread out. Out of the past seven years, this was just one year. We have many more years to see each other. Please listen to “BE” a lot. “BE” is a great album, everyone. We worked on this album more like a collection of pieces. That is, rather than songs with a strong impact, we wanted to put in pieces that were soft but easy to listen to for a long time. Dark circles? I’ve always had them. It’s not because I’m not well. You don’t have to be concerned. We all have dark circles. Black hair? My hair is not naturally pitch black. It’s close to brown under bright light. This is mostly my natural hair color. It’s naturally brown. It’s not pitch black.

32:24 - Am I enjoying the time off? I usually don’t. I get nervous when I’m not doing anything. I get bored, too. When we got some days off, I worked on my music a lot. I worked on my mixtape. These days, a day feels way too long. I have to work. My guitar? I want to play it, but I can’t. It’s in the car. It’s in our official vehicle. I’d always keep it in there. My favorite song in “BE”? It’s “Telepathy”. How do I get dressed? Let me tell you.

33:30 - After shoulder surgery, this is how you get dressed. First, I take this off when I wash myself. I take this off. There’s a velcro here. I take this off, and I wash. I wash using my right hand. And I have to dress myself starting with my left arm. Little by little. Then it’s my right arm afterward. I can’t wear a crew neck or a t-shirt. I have to wear button-up shirts. Usually, I’d wear training pants, or jerseys. Buttoning up is not easy either. It’s not easy. Washing with only one hand. As for the pants… I’d only wear ones with drawstrings, like sweatpants.

34:47 - La-Go-On SUGA, it means “Life Goes On SUGA”. What’s the toughest thing now? It’s that a day is way too long! The moment I wake up, I start thinking, ‘What should I do today’? Nornally, I… I’d have an official schedule every day. I really enjoy going to work every day. There are people I see all the time. Our staff, and people that I always see. They are like coworkers to me. I guess… There are a lot of staff at the office. I’d say hi to them as I begin my day. It was like a routine for me. But now, I wake up and think, ‘What should I do today’? What should I do? What do I have to do to make sure I have a productive day? That’s all I think about. The comments are going up way too fast. Anyway, everyone. Please don’t get hurt. It’s so hard when you get injured. You want to get the surgery for me? No, it’s too painful. It really is. As for me, I felt this when I had the appendectomy, too.

36:39 - I don’t think I feel as much pain as other people. I actually laugh a lot when I’m in serious pain. People think I’m weird. I laugh because it’s so unrealistically painful. I laughed a lot after the surgery this time as well. I just couldn’t believe how painful it was. Do you get how I feel? I had the appendectomy in 2013 and back then, I had a fever of about 40 degrees celsius. It was so unrealistic that my condition got so bad in such a short period. So I was laughing while I was being transferred to a hospital. It’s not because I’m happy that I laugh, but because I can’t believe how sick I am. Don’t be sick, everyone. Stay healthy. It’s been over 30 minutes now. Did I have lunch? Not yet. I’m on a diet these days. I guess I did gain a few pounds. I don’t have a bandage on. I just have this sling. While I’m wearing this, all my joints on my left side become stiff, including my elbow, wrist, shoulder, so… It doesn’t feel like my arm.

38:41 - I’m glad I didn’t have a rotator cuff repair. That hurts really bad, I heard. That’s because you’re reattaching muscles. I guess if I didn’t get surgery this time, I might have torn a rotator cuff as well. I already had some damage. I don’t really know all the exact medical terms. Anyway, I guess the membrane around the part was extremely vulnerable. Anyhow…

39:28 - I have to eat well for fast recovery? That’s true, but if I eat too well, I don’t think I’d be able to get back on stage soon. It’s not like I’m starving myself. I eat properly. I’m on a well-balanced diet. But I can’t move around much. I really want to work out. I want to shoot hoops and run around. But I can’t do any of that. Because I don’t move around much, naturally I gain weight. But, if I gain weight, I’ll have a hard time getting back on stage. I’ll have to go back and forth to the hospital. I feel sorry and grateful for the members who will be promoting without me.

41:13 - “How do you feel about Jimin getting as tall as you are”? I don’t care about my height so much. I don’t care about it at all, actually. I’m slightly taller than the average height of Koreans in their 20s. Which means, I’m not that tall. But I don’t care. When I first debuted, I wished I was taller. And tried out various things. Like wearing elevated shoes. But I don’t do that anymore. I just accepted it. Love Myself. It doesn’t bother me anymore. I don’t care if Jimin is 2 cm taller than I am. I’m the shortest? So be it. I’m 174 cm. I can go to the studio. Of course I can. I also can work on music. Like this. I would take the keyboard out go like this. I can’t play the keyboard. I can put chords only. But it’s not efficient. It’s too slow. Just.

42:55 - You’re asking me to come to so many countries. I’d love to. I hope the pandemic gets contained as soon as possible. KSAT is around the corner? Good luck, everyone. I was told KSAT will be held as scheduled. Please correct me if I’m wrong. Hope you prepare thoroughly so you won’t have any regrets. And people say KSAT is everything for you. But it’s not. I think it’s just a path of your life. There are lots of jobs in the world. So, even though you don’t get a good score, although it’s the best you do well, and I’m sure you’ll do well, but there are so many different paths in life. Comments are going up too fast. “Any movie you watched recently”? There aren’t many new movies now. They don’t release many. And they are released on diverse platforms. I saw some among them. But I tend to re-watch movies I’ve already watched. That’s the problem. I don’t really watch new ones. I recently saw “The Dark Knight 2” again. It was just there.

45:56 - You know the platform with lots of movies. I need to leave at 3. I can’t leave VLIVE on all day. I had to take the earrings off for surgery. I think it’s okay to put them back on now. I’m still not wearing bracelets. I used to wear them all the time. “Get well soon”. I hope so, too. How do I feel today? I feel good. There’s no reason to feel bad. I’m not always like, “I feel terrible”. That’s not how I am. I don’t know how long it’ll take for full recovery. Well… Let’s see. Joints are very stiff now. They’ll need to be loosened up first.

48:41 - If you happen to have a shoulder surgery, get a brace before. A brace like this. There’s a good one. For most ones, you get to put it on the neck. That hurts the neck really bad. The shoulders may get better, but the neck doesn’t. And it’s cheaper to get it from outside. I had no idea. You want to shoot a check? What does that mean? Why would you shoot a check? In some countries, it’s midnight now. Okay. In 4 minutes I’ll be off for your good night sleep. We have 3 minutes left.

50:22 - Actually I didn’t want to appear in braces like this. Because you’ll be worried. But since you were worried when I didn’t appear, I just came to say hello to you. Comments are going up too fast. Eat well and sleep tight? Okay. Thank you. I’ll try to get well soon. It’s very uncomfortable. Look at me. With my arms like this… I’ll get well soon. Until then… Please stay healthy, and hang in there for just a little bit. I’ll be back on stage, being healthy. We have 1 minute left. Anyway, everyone. I’ll be back soon. I’ll do my best on rehab. I heard it’s harder, though. I promise. I’ll be back as soon as possible, and perform on stages. It’s 3 now. Everyone, be healthy. About me… You don’t have to worry about me…that much. I’m getting better. Everyone, please enjoy “BE”. I’ll be streaming “BE,” too. Everyone, take care. I’ll be back soon. Goodbye. .