i think it might be useful to clarify a few things right off the bat by simple definition we are in the business of winning wars what else do you need an army for take the cold war we won without firing a single shot why number one we just flat out outspent them the russians couldn’t shovel money into the fire as fast as we could number two and this is where my command comes in technology nobody shapes nature the way we do we take atoms and molecules and before we’re finished with them they’re everything from combat boots to bombs the kind of bombs that nobody from the other side will ever see until the damn thing’s plowing down their chimney like santa claus from hell general uh what this is not the first time you’ve been here we’ve been down this road before that is correct several times in fact i haven’t been keeping count let me refresh your memory you have before you a document i do the sensor fused anti-tank missile i’ll be the first to admit that this program did have its share of difficulties we did experience a glitch or two with the thing and that much is certain but even a heat seeking missile can miss a target general i see here that you taped electric hot plates to the surface of the vehicle to help your heat-seeking missile find its target and that the temperature of the vehicle was so high that it could have fried an egg at 20 feet there was a verifiable deviation from the standard test data accumulation there were other deviations were there not what about the paveway bomb i’m not going to sit here and tell you the paveway never missed it missed by a mean distance of five miles and nearly 50 percent of the time you know in baseball a guy who hits 400 is considered pretty damn great in baseball the losing team isn’t killed by their opponents be that as it may the paveway is one hell of a bomb laser guided state of the art and it proved what that we have an effective weapon as long as the enemy allows us to build a two-story crane directly above their tanks we have had some spectacular successes such as that’s classified information general please uh let’s move on to the next item on our list the bradley fighting vehicle what would you say the batting average is for the bradley general it takes people with sophisticated knowledge and expertise to conduct these tests and to interpret the results if the us army acted on the advice of every tom dick and harry who had an opinion on these matters we’d wind up with a bunch of b-52s powered by outboard motors i failed to see your point my point is that a lot of things have to come together to create a new weapon and it takes teamwork good old-fashioned teamwork colonel james burton was he part of your team general more or less tell me how to get to two four forward and to the escalator your left two flights up to four your left e ring your right proceed past corridor nine face left thank you so it’s no secret that colonel burton had a rocky tenure that we didn’t see eye to eye but it didn’t start out that way no no no no no i spoke to general hall general hall spoke to general jones general jones spoke to admiral watts well then write it down that takes karispina in rhode island to maze from nebraska any democrats no forget him because he’s a scum-sucking judas he’d sell his own mother for a handful of votes how about the senate that son of a [ __ ] after we papered his state with contracts all right then let’s just make the fuselage of michigan and the landing gear in mississippi oh by all means let’s keep congressman groves and his blood-sucking buddies happy welcome colonel thank you general thought you and i ought to get to know one another i welcome the opportunity sir the fact is i’d like to help you thank you sir i don’t mean to alarm you colonel but this new job of yours under certain circumstances could turn into a real [ __ ] burning detail you’re gonna need as many friends as you can get i’d like you to count me as one of them well i appreciate that sir air force academy strategic air command mba from auburn you’re commanding officer general degrasso and i are old friends he says as far as you’re concerned the sky is the limit but then you draw the short straw that was a sign sir ah hell it’s a bum deal whoever made it every other year somebody decides we’re spending too much money so a bunch of pencil necks put their pointy little heads together and come up with a plan this year it’s the joint live fire test program staffed with officers from every branch of the service so now we got the army navy air force and marines doing a circle jerk over weapons testing and you get to hold the big dick i mean who thinks of this nonsense congress sir and so it should that’s its job you’ll never hear me criticize the hill although you think congress has enough of their own [ __ ] to shovel without wondering what’s going on over here well i’m not anticipating any problems with the posting sir neither am i man doesn’t come as far in his career as you have without knowing how to walk a minefield howard matheson came here two rotations ago that marlin is not the only thing he caught i got him in the sin commonly left here now he’s the head of their missile testing blake gilmore you know blake no sir man wasn’t even a full bird colonel when he left here for the private sector that was four years ago field frequency gained modulator contracts later and look at him man could buy and sell both of us a thousand times over lucky man smart man first-rate soldier just like you colonel knew how to make the best of a difficult situation now this new job of yours it’s too tough for any one man to go it alone it’s gonna require teamwork here you go these are a couple of your projects undergoing testing the uh-60 helicopter the av-8b jump jet and the bradley fighting vehicle all outstanding programs all organized and ready to go i did a little homework for you give your leg up well i appreciate that general you know you could return the favor by giving the bradley there just a little extra attention attention we need it in the field the sooner the better just make sure it goes on top of all the things in your inbox so that it’ll get into your outbox as soon as possible as a personal favorite of me best of luck to you colonel thank you sir colonel sir next time you’re told to report to this office be on time yes sir sir colonel james burton i’m here to take a look at the bradley fighting vehicle test straight ahead sir thank you there he is that’s the guy that’s him supposed to be real smart squadron officers school air command and staff college first tour at the pentagon he was at the air force lab in albuquerque when congress called he’s a soldier not just a manager what do you mean he’s put in his fair share of flying time it’s like a [ __ ] choir boy to me maybe but nothing gets ordered into production until he signs off good to see you this is major sayers our chief tester army weapons research lab so have an air force guy end up overseeing tests run by the army well could have been worse how’s that congress could have appointed someone from the navy tension on the firing line attention on the firing line you’re ready on the right ready on the left firing line is ready firing damn impressive armor congratulations all right great showing me gentlemen joining us colonel burton congratulations thanks for your help on that one you know we couldn’t have done it with that thanks for your help on that one thank you hey colonel are you going to join all us shouldn’t we take a closer look no no actually safety precautions gee the fire team goes out there first and then no one else is allowed near the vehicle for at least another hour well why is that with any anti-armor test involving a live round there’s always a freak chance that something might blow after the fact plus we don’t want to lose your first day on the job colonel so how about that drink sounds good there’ll be a phone call for you in your office at exactly 100 hours it’s important you’ll be there good morning morning sergeant good morning sir i took the liberty of unpacking a few of your things thank you sergeant family sir what’s that family oh that’s my uncle he was a flyer in world war ii huh what’s that this is the plane i learned to fly in t28 used to take her up slide the canopy back fly for hours just me in the sky personally sir i like the sky right where it is with me on the ground looking up at it so where you from sir just outside of chicago hmm and where would that be normal normal illinois is that on a map yes sergeant it is is it normal and normal i think the word is uneventful you getting paid by the owl colonel no no i um got an appointment i’ll um take this sergeant thank you fine colonel burton hello the test on the bradley i hear you wanted to take a closer look how did you hear that when it comes to the bradley follow your instincts colonel who is this i can’t tell you that right now well whoever you are i don’t take unsolicited advice from people i don’t know just make sure you read the fine print colonel you’re up early sir well i thought i’d drop by on my way to the office sergeant check out the bradley sir isn’t your office 40 miles that way sir yes sergeant yes it is has anything been altered on this vehicle since the test no sir are you looking for something sir just reading the fine print sergeant just reading the fine print stinger missiles 50 cal tracers 7.
62 tracers 25 millimeter rounds what’s this that’s what was used on the bradley sir this writing it’s romanian isn’t it yes sir it is sir colonel bach and major says won’t be here until noon that’s when our first test of the day is scheduled sir well this isn’t exactly an all-out test sergeant more like a little pop quiz i’m not sure regulations will allow us to borrow the door from the ammunition ship for a pop quiz sir uh-huh sir regulations state that the ammunition shed should never be left open sir duly noted sergeant i believe that regulation will also apply to removing the door entirely colonel also duly doted fire when ready back blast area clear on the way sir fire the ammunition that was used in the last test on the bradley is the same as we used on this door romanian arguably the most ineffective ammunition in the world no wonder the bradley came through with flying colors well this is very serious it is yes you’ve destroyed a door colonel we’re talking about a test on an armored personnel carrier a vehicle that will carry soldiers into combat right but this door is part of the united states government i assume you knew that the shell barely penetrated the door okay but now it’s all bent out of shape how are you going to get it back on its hinges well right now i’m not really worried about putting it back on yes but this door protects our ammunition the ammunition doesn’t work but we need the ammunition for our test look i’ll buy the army a new goddamn door you can’t afford a door like that did you see what it stood up to exactly some some spitball from romania it was my understanding that only soviet arms would be used in these tests well yes and romania is one of the soviet blocks isn’t it colonel burton we’ve been testing the bradley for some time now you may not be aware of some of the steps we’ve taken the romanian rocket is only 73 millimeters that’s less than the 85 millimeter russian version a smaller diameter means a smaller explosion and a smaller hole and less shrapnel we’re interested in conducting ballistic tests using all sorts of ammunition of varying diameters to determine the exact threshold of the bradley’s tolerance so far it’s held up against everything we’ve thrown at it sorry soviet romanian latvian lithuanian like a rock my apologies well you’re new to the project there’s a lot to catch up on you’re right so if you’ll just get me the test reports i can catch right up how’s that cuddle send me the data i’ll do my homework and we can push this thing right through but we’ve got five years of test reports on this model of loans we have a schedule to maintain and let’s keep to it get the bradley into production asap what do you say thank you gentlemen i have sincom recruiting me this could blow the whole deal i’m telling you so you’ve got to nip this in the bud like you did with the last guy don’t worry about it sir he wants to see the report how are we going to stop him just give him the report are you out of your mind i’m not going to show him a single page now listen to me listen very carefully give him everything he wants every single piece of paper everything what the heck is all this everything you ever want to know about the bradley and we’re in the fray desk every memo on every last nut and bolt wonder which national forest laid down its life for this project you read any of this stuff not yet sir i was hoping you’d show up with the cliff notes i hardly know where to start maybe that’s the whole idea i don’t get it what that so bradley well if that’s the bradley then what’s this what’s the date 1968.
the question is how did they get to that from this gentleman our mission was to design and implement an infantry transport vehicle that would be a worthy replacement for the m113 armored personnel carrier we have met that objective and then some the bradley armored personnel carrier will bring troops to a combat zone swiftly efficiently and safely it will hold 11 men plus a driver and features a 20 millimeter cannon which will provide amplifier power and at the same time flexibility lightly armored speedy and solidly engineered our troops will be arriving at the battlefield in the very finest american technology has to offer and at a million and a half per a real bargain nice work colonel outstanding damn impressive in other words it was designed to be a big taxi cab drive guys to the battlefield and go back home but how did it end up with a turret on top well this is all well and good colonel smith but something wrong general well with this gorilla in production i don’t suppose there’s going to be anything left in the budget for my scout daddy bob you don’t need scouts you have radar air recon satellites you always need a scout and you know what i’m thinking why couldn’t this thing serve as a scout but it’s a it’s a troop carrier general but this is a speedy vehicle why can’t it be both well for one thing it’s too big and for the other you can’t really see out all that much from inside sounds like a design for all of me design flaw no no we we’ll just stick a turret on top with lots of opticals but then sir it’ll be even bigger well what’s your problem smith not elegant enough for you well the thing is general it’s kind of hard to do a sneak and peek when you’re over 10 feet tall he’s got a point bob well all i know is we need a scout this is fast enough to do the job and it’s funded well um actually we’re a hair over budget you turn the bradley into a scout we’re gonna be selling them off to some el president ate a chimichanga in no time anything for surveillance ends up south of the border before the paint even dries when you needed that anti-aircraft gun who backed you up on that you did bob and who testified to appropriations on behalf of that gun you did bob i’m talking to appropriations next week now do i sell you on my scout or do i not you did bob and how about some portholes along the side for individual firearms so the fellows can stick out their guns and shoot people good and you know what colonel we already have the turret we ought to get the biggest bang we can up there i’m sorry bang sir you can’t hurt anybody with that pansy ass gun add on some firepower where am i supposed to fit the extra ammo i don’t know can you just shift things around make some room you already got 4 400 rounds of machine gun ammo now you want to add 25 millimeter shelves general wants his ammo he can’t have his ammo unless he runs alongside this thing carrying it well can you just squeeze it in no oh come on just squeeze it in we’re not trying on levi’s here colonel are you telling me that in a vehicle this size you can’t find room for a few rounds of ammunition not in its current configuration no sir so the configuration’s wrong there must be something you can do something you don’t need general the interior is very spare besides the ammunition and the men maybe you can leave one of the fellows behind but the ammo where the men go sir it is a troop carrier so make a couple extra trips what’s the difference they want a transport that doesn’t carry men and a scout that’s got a cannon as big as a tanks on it and portholes oh great portholes so the guys can shoot out whatever they can’t hit with their cannon you don’t have to buy the damn thing jones just draw it that’s one hell of a cannon that’s a problem why you go out in a battlefield with this pecker sticking out of your turret and the enemy’s gonna unloading you with all they got might as well paint a big red bull’s eye on the side but it’s a troop carrier not a tank do you want me to put a sign on it in 50 languages i’m a troop carry not a tank please don’t shoot at me this was gonna be so beautiful that’s good work smith looks perfect to me thank you sir thing is yes general looks a little like a tank with that cannon on top uh probably gonna draw more fire actually sir that has come to our attention we know it’s not a tank but will the other side i guess we could always thicken the armor toughen up the hide a bit colonel smith could you explain why you put those portals there uh yes sir as per your request so the men could shoot out um at the enemy you’re joking aren’t you besides portholes what are we in now the navy say you think you could make this thing amphibious you know get the troops across a river no uh no sir no no no no no no amphibious the bradley’s supposed to swim in theory at least amphibious troop carrier slash scourge slash tank couple more months i bet they can get this thing to fly what’s this in the margin please help me i am losing my mind rls lieutenant colonel robert laurel smith head of oversight and development aluminum this thing’s got an aluminum skin huh anything an enemy tank fires at is gonna go through it like a hot knife through butter we’re doing the specs on using steel rather than aluminum of course steel is much heavier than aluminum so it won’t go as fast no we can’t lose speed we lose speed it won’t work as a scout vehicle it won’t keep pace with m1 tanks either thicker armor is a reactive measure let’s think proactive here i say equip the thing with anti-tank missiles then it can blast those enemy tanks before they get a chance to fire what do you think colonel fine anti-tank missiles i don’t know where do i put them the men will have to wear the missiles as hats i don’t know jones that’s why you get paid the big bucks colonel there’s no room we’re not talking about a pair levi’s i know i know god damn it what we are talking about is 11 years with nothing to show for except that also the size of the district of columbia in a career that’s on permanent hull you see this i’ve been i’ve been a bird colonel so long i swear i’m growing feathers now if you have to design hats to hold those goddamn missiles then just do it know uh ladies and gentlemen if i can have your attention please if you’d all just take your seats thank you we are pleased to present a scale model of the new bradley fighting vehicle featuring scout troop transport and anti-tank capabilities it carries six men how many was it supposed to carry 11.
bradley is outfitted with the most sophisticated surveillance equipment ever developed it is also equipped with a rapid-fire cannon and an anti-tank rocket launcher which means it’s loaded with 1500 shells and ten-toe anti-tank missiles so in summation gentlemen what you have before you is a troop transport that can’t carry troops a reconnaissance vehicle that’s too conspicuous to do reconnaissance and a quasi-tank that has less armor than a snow blower but has enough ammo to take out half of dc fantastic congratulations general smith general hell of a job dinner let’s build it they’re building it this is what we’re building please be seated this will be brief as i’m needed at the oval office i want to call your attention to this morning’s new york times if you’d be so kind to turn to the editorial page it essentially says that every weapon we produce is an overpriced piece of junk now that’s not news critics have said it for years what was news to me touched on our supposedly spectacular sergeant-york anti-aircraft gun it says there that when the sergeant york proved incapable of hitting airplanes we test fired it at hovering helicopters when it failed to hit hovering helicopters we fired it at stationary targets and it missed those now is this possible general keem there was a problem with the proximity fusing according to this one missile locked onto a ventilation fan in a latrine and destroyed the latrine were we test firing at latrines that day my first sergeant was in that latrine at the time and i can assure you he’s around to swear otherwise why am i learning about these things in the newspaper it makes me look foolish and i am not a foolish man general cushing are you having any problems with the maverick missile you’re testing no sir admiral morehouse any problems with the a-12 none whatsoever sir general partridge sir any problems with the bradley no sir absolutely not production is imminent mr secretary i believe the press is on a wild goose chase looking for problems where none exists let’s hope you’re right general because there are people in this administration who do have problems terrorists in lebanon and colonel gaddafi in libya and sandinistas and nicaragua and let’s not forget our ongoing problems with the soviet union frankly i don’t appreciate calls from reporters and congressmen asking me why nothing we are working on works and i can’t answer them because the men in charge of developing these systems tell me everything is just peachy so if you don’t have problems good if you do get rid of them i want these weapons built if not by you i’ll find men who can you wanted to see me sir yes i do close the damn door come on about these tests you’ve been thinking about conducting on the bradley i understand your concern but if you knew the vehicle as i do if you were an armored warfare expert instead of a flyer you wouldn’t be concerned you’d understand that the bradley is a good vehicle 4 000 americans will be employed building it the army wants it once you’ve had a chance to read the files i’ve read the file sir 200 pages on the rear door 250 pages on the paint job computer simulations of combat conditions not a single test that actually indicates what might happen if the bradley takes a hit which is why i’ve ordered a full up live fire test i want to equip a bradley with all the ammunition it will take into battle fill all the fuel tanks and hit it with the soviet anti-tank weapons see how it’ll hold up cancel it sir i think we’re having a communication meltdown here colonel whatever problems there are we’ll fix them in the field after they’re deployed the general that’s the way things are done around here colonel that’s the way we’re gonna do this nobody takes your job more seriously than i do but i also have a job gotta get that bradley deployed i want that rocket launcher pointed at the soviets here jesus yes sir what happened to you don’t ask what’s this it was on your desk when i got back from lunch some ammunition for your bradley battle it’s a british army test report top secret too till it landed here general smith jim burton how did you find me you have very uh distinctive handwriting i’ve been reading memos on the bradley going back to 1968 with your handwritten notes in the margin all initialed by you this handwriting we should not be soon talking look you contacted me no he received an anonymous leak about which i know nothing so the british found out that aluminum helmet burns and gives off a toxic gas when hit by a shell bad news for men in aluminum armored vehicles enough said couldn’t we couldn’t we sit down somewhere and actually talk are you out of your mind colonel if the pentagon had their choice of busting us or nailing a soviet spy they would choose us in a heartbeat who exactly is us general there are some people who work in the pentagon who are fed up watching billions of dollars thrown away on defective weapons upon which our troops are supposed to stake their lives people like you colonel we are the enemy to whom to majors who want to be colonels to colonels who want to be generals the generals who want that four-star you bet we are the enemy nobody moves up without getting things done so what you don’t want to be is the one who drops the ball cause if you’re the one who drops the ball no promotion no star no cushy job with a contractor when you retire which is why colonel any and everyone attached to the bradley will see to it to stop your tests general i appreciate your interest if not your methods whatever disagreements i may or may not be having over the bradley will be resolved above board now if you have something to say i’m sure the washington post would love to talk to you me the press are you crazy the army is my life like you colonel i work inside the system and you don’t have a prayer in hell to run in your tests not unless you’re willing to sacrifice your career and if you think you’re safe because congress gave you your job you better think again good day colonel good luck so why did you send me that report i see you generally so she leaned over to me and whispered why do you think the general always stands at attention i’m sorry to disturb you sir but major says he’s in the library don’t mention sarah’s i’m busy i’m sorry sir but he said to tell you that the little prick order tests on the bradley watch i’ll have his ass on the sling so who’s that sir major sears of the little prick but a general sir he now seems to know about the study that the brits did what study bridge did a study on aluminum that would be the same aluminum sheathing used on the bradley sir when hit by a shell that has a tendency to burn when it burns it gives off a toxic gas god damn it we fought a revolution so we wouldn’t have to pay any attention to the [ __ ] british so why are they messing things up now i thought you talked to him i did a man must be an idiot or a fool well can’t you stop him sir no i’m not his commanding officer some draft dodging junior congressman decided we needed more objectivity in the testing process god damn checks and balances right but general with all due respect this isn’t just a check sir it’s more of a full [ __ ] body block if we don’t get the bradley out there now it’ll be stuck in development forever start production now i’ll throw burt in a bone or two let him run a couple of tests yes sir general actually he’d like to blow it up i don’t give a flying [ __ ] what burton wants let him do some piddly [ __ ] stuff take it for a test drive see if he can parallel park the [ __ ] just get it into production am i to understand that you were not in favor of the tests colonel burton proposed absolutely not absolutely not yes or absolutely not no absolutely not absolutely are you questioning his motives or his methods general i have no reason to question colonel burton’s motives i can only speak to his methods which by anyone’s definition were somewhat peculiar i mean there were other ways to find out if clothing would catch fire inside the bradley when it took a hit let’s take the the mannequin thing yes phone call for you sir they said it’s important very good dog yes sir i’ll meet you back at the firing area yes sir strip the dummies sir strip the dummy sergeant now thank you let’s go fire when ready backwards area clear on let me see those uh-huh oh that looks good uniform great wait what what’s that that’s part of our test that’s part of our test wait a minute certainly no one in my command gave the order to strip the dummies and put their clothes inside a fireproof container inside the vehicle while colonel burton wasn’t around the insults that were traded that day definitely had no business showing up in the test reports they were of course deleted from the final report all except colonel bach’s unfortunate reference to colonel burton’s mother understand temperatures we’re running high apparently inside the bradley as well there’s a degree of uncertainty involved in every test that’s the point of doing tests to find out what happens if we knew what the results would be we wouldn’t need to do the test and just because the tests didn’t always come out the way colonel burton expected there’s no reason to assume that anything devious was going on i ask you general filling the fuel tanks with water for a test designed to check the combustibility of those tanks that wasn’t devious if the tanks had been filled with fuel there’s a good chance the vehicle would have exploded isn’t that the point if the vehicle had exploded we couldn’t run additional tests i can’t order up unlimited number of bradleys just to blow them up that’s of course you’re telling me to spend more money which i can’t imagine you are general i believe that efforts were made to make the bradley amphibious yes although how that’s relevant but i failed to comprehend how many bradleys were lost during that experiment lost the report says four of the bradleys sank during well that testing a matter of opinion it’s not opinion general four of them sank technically yes general can we get back to the fuel tanks okay sergeant have the tanks always been filled with water no sir only when the vehicle’s being tested sir what else don’t i know sergeant i’m asking you a question what else don’t i know about these tests the ammunition stored into bradley sir what about it sand that’s affirmative sir tell me did the term court-martial ever enter anyone’s mind here no sir really that’s truly amazing sergeant i mean here we are watching water drip out of the gas tanks and sand spill out of the ammunition right after a test that was done to figure out whether or not the damn thing is safe and no one here even thinks of the term court martial now why if you don’t mind my asking is that we were under order sir do you think acting on those orders is conscionable sergeant it doesn’t matter what i think or do sir because you desk warriors from washington will show up and find a million different ways to make the test turn out whatever way you want sir i’m not here to manipulate test results i’m here to learn the truth you want the truth sir we get a new white night every other year sir some guy just like you and you all start off the same big speeches that turn this [ __ ] after six months when your next promotion comes due and then as business as usual and where did you pick up this lousy attitude sergeant right here sir watching guys like you i’m sorry i’m really sorry to hear that because unlike you i take my job seriously really well maybe maybe you can explain to me colonel why the brand has been ordered into production before you have done your job do you mind telling me what this is a hundred bradleys have been we have a schedule colonel burton and i’m not gonna have it on my record that the bradley fell behind schedule just because you’re fussing over some goddamn test those goddamn tests could save lives the bradley will save lives colonel by bringing them to the front line where they’re needed do you have any idea colonel what would happen to those men if the bradley takes a hit and the aluminum burns i know all about the british study colonel and it is [ __ ] that thing could be a death trap says who says me and how do you know have you put people in there during a test no of course so you don’t know colonel actually know anything and until you do all you’re doing is wasting our time are you suggesting colonel burton had no reason to be concerned i am suggesting that colonel burton and his tests did not reveal anything we didn’t already know except his own penchant for theatrics theatrics generally yes theatrics cheap theatrics at that so billy now the little prick has issued a memo that stipulates that for the tests he’d like to use sheep jesus we’ve already started working the chassis dave don’t worry about it well cause if the sheep come out of this thing tits up we’re gonna have to start production it weighs around it weighs around anything absolutely like what well we could stick the animal rights people on them yeah well it is cruel and unusual treatment of sheep rack of lamb yeah that would be me yes may just say it’s just called sir uh-huh when do they plan to run the test immediately just as soon as we send over the sheep we i thought they were in charge of the sheep they say it’s being handled at our end the surgeon general’s office what does the surgeon general have to do with sheep ah excuse me you must be colonel birdman we were told you might show up who told you that colonel bach he established this office last week with the surgeon general you’re the one who’s trying to kill the bradley well who told you that i’m sorry sir all information in this office is classified so what is ruminant procurement anyway that’s what this office has been created to do yeah but what is it the analysis and policy determination for the parameters about which will be tendered research data on the optimal test ruminant such ruminants are to be she you’re talking about sheep you’re in charge of buying the sheep correct we can’t just go out and buy sheep sir why not we’re doing a vaporifix test on sheep i mean vaporifix is all about what happens when a warhead penetrates armor the metal particles vaporize and form a large fireball that fills the truth lieutenant i know what a vaporifix test is i’m the one who called for it well then you know we have to have sheep specs before we can proceed cheap specs what are sheep specs specifications shorn or unshorn um rams views or lamps mourinho’s are short hair i mean sean marino hughes are unshorn moreno rams big horns are domestic domestic shore and lambs are big horn unsure just how long will it take you to get your sheep specs not long at all six eight months tops and then we can go to tender on the research debt but then we’ll require another eight months to evaluate the debt after which we can move in the prototype room and evaluation how much well all right bring it back keep coming coming keep coming sir colonel back is on his way over here sir i’m sure he is for your information sir it sounded like a world-class [ __ ] fit sir i’m sure it is sergeant come on it’s moving out the hell are these sheep doing here i bought them well you can’t do that i did they’re no sheep specs colonel sorry devise the sheep specs major what are they they’re alive and kicking that’s good enough for me testing is a science journal every test has to be a controlled experiment just sticking her to sheep into a vehicle you don’t want sheep leonard chavez get the sheep out of there and get in the bradley dalton yes sir getting the brag sir i need a vaporifix test get in the bradley everyone in the bradford you’re totally out of your [ __ ] mind colonel you think this is some kind of joke colonel well let’s see would just use the sheep that’s a terrific idea these sheep in the battle ball sheep we’re gonna get down back plus very clear on the way sir fire god granger don’t breathe how are you doing i’m okay jesus there’s one tiny whiff did you get a look inside nothing could have survived those fumes said they had to go in the incinerator what they just caught him away sir oh yes sir sergeant i need them for autopsy to verify test results i see him we got him sir concentrate on the sheep damn it what the hell are you stopping us for stop the sheep what’s a hurry sir not one of the tests i’ve ordered has been conducted according to plan and since my job my job is to stop whining and serve the united states as befits an officer my job general is to oversee the joint life fire test program and deliver a report on my findings to congress and in order to do that i’m going to have to insist on a live fire test of the bradley under combat conditions they’re simply your [ __ ] boy you don’t know jack [ __ ] about combat i know there are a lot of ways for a soldier to die in that vehicle sir don’t you preach to me you son of a [ __ ] i want a realistic the number one priority is to get these people first vehicle second those are my priorities unfortunately the army’s priorities seem to be the exact opposite you are way out of line here i won’t sign off on the bradley without a live fire test sir those burdens commanding officer general degrasso sir get them for me now it’s an economic move colonel department-wide you’re being reassigned in the meantime should i should i continue in my present assignment your present assignment has been eliminated colonel i didn’t think my job could be eliminated i was appointed by congress but you’re paid by the army if they can’t afford you and they can’t you have no job colonel it’s time to move on let’s not let this little blip on the screen ground you permanently would the colonel ever consider having a drink with an enlisted soldier does the enlisted soldier think the colonel needs one what are they gonna do fire you okay just a little one uh you know what’s really ironic general omar bradley was a brilliant tactician and a great leader no ego just did the job and he looked out for the morale and the safety of his men and then they go and put his name on this thing talk about a kick in the ass the closest the brass ever get to a battlefield is the first t on a saturday morning you know fannie i’ve been around long enough to know that the pentagon is not a charity it’s it’s cash flows and egos it’s part of it it’s what helps drive it fine but somehow somehow i always thought men came first i always thought that the people on top knew that it was about the soldier in the field you gave it your best shot didn’t i yes sir you did well now it’s somebody else’s problem my problem is salvaging my career which apparently is not beyond repair i’m a good little boy so that’s it that’s it the man said or as hell should have tried peacetime you don’t mind do you no be my guest i don’t believe in government waste burton so they’re moving you out is there anything you don’t hear about well how far are you willing to go with this thing question is how far are they going to send me i think you ought to take a trip to california this weekend i’m not really up for a vacation right now no one goes to fresno for a vacation colonel i’m here to see the project manager so colonel burton yes steve johnson project manager hi thank let’s you what the hell is going on here who changed the specs he israeli the israelis win when they place their order so these are for exports yes all of them this colonel you’re telling me we’re manufacturing two different versions of this vehicle the israelis wouldn’t take the bradley’s design kernel they’re running the fuel tanks on the outside reinforced armor a different ventilation system what about the specs for our bradleys exactly like the ones you obsessed in colonel no change think you were followed i followed i drove around for hours i don’t even know where we are maybe you’d prefer to meet at the officers club so when did the israelis test it i didn’t have to test it they knew by looking at it that it was a death trap that’s why we’re sending our guys off to die the pentagon brass is redesigning the damn thing for somebody else they can’t sell it overseas like it is business as usual so maybe you’d like to keep fighting the bastards i’ve lost my job general they’re moving me out bro they’re moving you out you haven’t been discharged work from inside from wherever it is they send you and turn it to you passing anonymous notes and meeting in parking lots you know you’re great at sitting in the shadows and telling people what to do why don’t you get off your ass and do something i can’t help me i have done everything that i can i’ve been fighting this battle for almost 20 years i’m not gonna go to the man over this i i’ve got too much to lose seventy thousand troops seventy thousand american boys will ride into battle in the bradley if america fights another war we can’t be a part of sending them to their deaths one call what one call i’ll make one call and that’s it general partridge you’ve read today’s washington post i have mr secretary and i take it you’ve seen the story attributed to an anonymous highly placed pentagon source yes i have sir and may i say i am as deeply distressed as you that anyone in the pentagon would stoop so low leaks within the pentagon general are how i get most of my information mr secretary are you suggesting that the pentagon is less than forthcoming less than forthcoming general then perhaps you can explain to me why i have to learn from the press that the man in charge of testing the bradley fighting vehicle has been fired it wasn’t fired sir he was reassigned by whom by general degrasso his commanding officer i’m as shocked as you are my guess is that there was some confusion between the army the air force commands that’s the sort of trouble you always get with these cross-departmental joint testing programs yes sam what can i do for you what article oh that article no completely untrue interoffice snafu file it under creative journalism i’m looking into it now you’ll be the first to know right right my best alan general i want a full update on the bradley and i want it in writing right away sir that is the last call i expect to receive on this matter from congressman stratton or anyone else on the hill do i make myself clear general perfectly colonel burton i want you to write your report on the bradley sir i was under the impression that my job had been your job has been reinstated why don’t you report at my desk by 1800 hours tomorrow yes sir and colonel in case you are unaware as per the military manual you will deliver your report to me and to me alone should so much as a single copy of your report be made public i will bring you up on charges of willful subversion of military procedure and have you court martial stop packing we’re staying we’re staying how’d you do that i didn’t do anything do we have a rule book a rule book sir you know a book with rules in it what do you need a rule book for playing by the rules because i always play by the rules how do you know you’re playing by the rules if you need a rule book to tell you what the rules are i need a rule book to tell me which rules i just get me the book uh you need anything else sir chinese food no does no thank you sergeant i’m fine well then night sir what sounds better the bradley has so far failed virtually every test or the testing program of the bradley has been without any coherent standards they both sound like something the general wouldn’t want in his report this is not just a report it’s a deadly weapon sir an m16 is a deadly weapon a report is just a pile of paper unless you plan to inflict a lot of extremely vicious paper cuts go home sergeant good night sir the failure of the bradley to incorporate even the most elementary safeguards to protect the troops inside raises questions about the integrity and the manner in which the vaporifix test was carried out suggests either negligence or a failure in the chain of command had any troops been inside the vehicle as it is currently configured they would have been killed either by toxic fumes flames or by the overpressure created by the powerful expanding gas in the compartment and as a result of manifest deficiencies in every area this office as a result of manifest this office is deficiencies the immediate necessity life fire fire testing under combat conditions rewrite it sir rewrite the [ __ ] piece of garbage so it smells like a rose the bradley test standards have been consistently altered in extreme ways the bradley tests have been extremely consistent they have altered the standards for testing test after test has revealed design flaws in the bradley the marginalized optimal performance data suggests optimal performance data suggests no vaporific shift at this time that’s brilliant lieutenant that sounds [ __ ] lutely brilliant thank you sir but sir what what does it mean what do you mean what does it mean you wrote it good afternoon the bradley tests have been extremely consistent they have altered the standards for testing have you actually read this thing it’s exactly the opposite of what you wrote how can they do that they’re playing by the book sergeant and so am i paper cuts vicious paper cuts the characterization in your report is at best a serious misunderstanding of the testing procedures on a vehicle as flawed as the bradley as noted in my original report the integrity jesus christ who did this [ __ ] thing go to the distribution page listed 198 names court marshall the son of a [ __ ] lock him up now oh we can’t we sure as hell can burton’s playing by the book his report was classified it was sent to you you revised it and sent it back to him he wrote a memo on your revision which in accordance with regulations can be sent to anyone remotely involved with the bradley in this case 198 people i’ll [ __ ] kill him i will fillet him i will draw and quarter him i’ll stick his head in the vice we can’t touch him sir it’s by the book then you find me something in that goddamn book that’ll help me fry the little son of a [ __ ] what sir the washington post is on the phone well that was fast leaks don’t usually get to them until after lunch yes no i’m sorry can i comment on that right now thank you no yes no he he cannot comment on that sorry but on i can’t comment no no no comment sorry bye getting locked off from not saying anything burton no comment i i can’t comment is there anything i can comment on well yes i just received orders that i am to report for duty in alaska alaska is a prestige posting senator no no no i assure you that memo with his had absolutely nothing to do with his being transferred oh senator i’m sorry i’ve just been informed that secretary weinberger’s on the other line yes i’ll get right back to you i promise thank you sir before you pick up weinberger’s on two uh line one is the times line three is the wall street journal line four is newsweek line five is the house armed services commissioner’s armed services committee what do they want hearings sir on the bradley foreign alaska what i said alaska general as i said in my opening remarks madam chairman a lot of things have to come together to create teamwork good old-fashioned teamwork yes you told us general and colonel burton’s not a team player he’s a rogue operator i’m not a name caller madam chairman but if you wish to make that connection that would be your choice not mine did you ever say to colonel burton if i get one more call from the hill about your uh expletive deleted reports you’ll be sitting on your brains does that sound like me sir just answer the question general please i don’t remember saying it not that i wasn’t provoked two witnesses testified that you said those exact words to colonel burton outside the pentagon pharmacy i have visited the pharmacy quite a bit lately for antacids but i would never say anything like that to anyone let alone fellow officer but you make no secret of your antagonism towards colonel burton it’s his report that i don’t approve of colonel burton’s report is fallacious misinformed and accusatory and i have no use for an officer who is more interested in grabbing headlines than he isn’t defending this country at this time the committee would like to call as witness colonel james g burton united states air force chairman yes general as you must know under the rules of military conduct no man can appear at these hearings without the express order of his commanding officer unfortunately general degrasso is on a fact-finding tour of our bases in germany i don’t believe general degrasso has given any order for colonel burton to testify you’re quite bright general but as colonel burton has been transferred to alaska he’s no longer under general degrasso’s command am i correct do you swear to tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you god i do looks like you’ve stirred up a hornet’s nest colonel that was never my intention ma’am what was your intention simply to do the job i was assigned to do the army test reports do not make the possibility of casualties a top priority in fact general partridge’s report on the bradley doesn’t even mention the word casualty not once i came to the conclusion that what was required was a live fire test i requested such a test repeatedly did you get that test no ma’am i did not why not i wanted more realism than army testing was accustomed to providing you want realism general you are out of order adam chairman in the interest of resolving some of the issues presented here today i’d like to say something please be brief general of course colonel burton wants more realism so let’s talk about the real world for a moment the real world has enemies in it there are forces at work even now as we speak with one objective in mind the destruction of this country we must not we will not allow those forces to prevail for if we do you can be certain that you and i and everyone else will never again enjoy the luxury of meeting in this building to debate anything as i said at the outset we are in the business of winning that takes teamwork general the teamwork you sow prize i take it it was in full force during the development of the bradley fighting vehicle textbook perhaps you’d like to tell us how much has been spent so far to develop the bradley how much well you have the figures don’t you of course um uh 14 more or less 14 14 million yeah what did you say general brilliant billion with a b with a b 14 billion dollars for designing one armored vehicle that’s one way of looking at it of taxpayers money we are all taxpayers after all we’re in this together general how many years has this program been running bear with me just a moment uh uh well let me oh 12 15 17.
87:56 - 17. which is evidence of the enormous care my team takes in the development of every weapons system undertaken by the pentagon 17 years 14 billion dollars of the taxpayers money general i think it’s time the american public gets the live-fire test that colonel burton wants tomorrow’s the big day sir uh-huh i’ll tell you one thing every damn one of these nuts and bolts has been taken off and put back on again this wouldn’t be flame retardant would it you think they made the men trick this whole thing up wouldn’t surprise me not a bit ladies gentlemen looks like you’ve been working hard corporal sir let me have one of those m16s i want to tell you a story you got a problem with that sergeant no sir about a year ago i went to the veterans hospital is it a friend of mine for my flying days only i took a wrong turn when i got off the elevator now when i look back on it i think i was meant to go down that corridor cause that’s where i met phil thank you corporal but sir let me finish dalton i want to pass on something i learned about the m16 from phil you all know the m16 better than i do a lot of you used it in vietnam but you were lucky in the early days of that war they sent guys off to fight with m16s and jammed in combat a little bit of dust a little bit of rain the gun was useless maybe those early m16s weren’t tested properly maybe somebody somewhere was more worried about a production schedule or a promotion than he was about those grunts in some faraway jungle who might end up with their stomachs in their hands but you don’t know anyone that happened to do you no i’m sure not otherwise you’d be out there right now making sure that that bradley is exactly and i mean exactly the way it would be under normal combat conditions with some of your buddies riding inside guys like phil only phil has been in a coma for the last 20 years since the day his m16 jammed somewhere outside of benoit but hell you don’t know the guy or anybody like him right so okay everything all right all fine sir just fine keep coming keep coming keep coming little more keep coming keep coming sergeant sir everything all right sergeant fine sir oh thank you like some party ladies and gentlemen please be seated thank you and gentlemen distinguished members of congress i think it’s fair to say that you’ll be seeing enough from this test to give you the basis once and for all to form your own conclusion about the sort of systemic excellence we’ve been pursuing i will be giving the signal shortly when i do i want you to visualize combat conditions imagine that the men firing that round are the enemy and that the bradley i don’t have to tell you the bradley is on our side ladies and gentlemen distinguished members of congress i give you your bradley fighting vehicle oh sergeant everything’s gonna go as planned isn’t it to go exactly as it should sir as planned right couple this is sergeant dalton move the vehicle about five yards forward and then clear out over further roger the bradley can be fired accurately how much fuel is in those tanks sergeant just enough to do those maneuvers no more than it would have if it was in combat sir fired in the larger mountain on the left side and the ammunition inside the bradley of the specs sir who specs and capable of keeping pace with maine battles carrying infantry troops needed to support tank operations on the bradley fighting vehicle the vehicle that will carry our boys to victory for many many years to come back blast area clear fire oh sir could you uh explain please well we tried to tell you sir you see sir when you gave us that speech last night we had already fixed the vehicle back to the way it should be so you were uh you were ahead of me i don’t know about a head but we’ve been behind you ever since you fried those mannequins and the sheep sir man that was epic i’m sorry i made you listen to that lecture now i uh sir well you have nothing to apologize for sir we had you figured wrong the men come first with you and you prove that it was a hell of a good speech though sir anytime you want to give another one you know where to find us thank you men thank you all sir so so oh for space plain is from you.